How To Break Up With Your RealtorÂŽ

There’s nothing easy about break ups. 

Personal or professional, they just suck.  

And when it comes to breaking up with your realtor, it’s no different.

Every year thousands of buyers and sellers end their contractual commitments with real estate agents in America.  It’s actually quite common.

However, many buyers and sellers go about this the wrong way.  Knowing how to gracefully end your relationship with your realtor is a critical skill that most do not possess.

How do I know?

I get hundreds of phones calls a year from buyers and sellers who tell me that they are frustrated, upset and disappointed with their agent.  Usually, they call me to directly purchase their home while they fire their realtor simultaneously.

I can tell you from experience, it does not always go as smooth as they hope.

This article is going to show you the right way to break up with your realtor. 

You’ll learn:

Let’s jump in!


KEY TAKEAWAYS:

  • Not all realtors do a good job of helping buyers and sellers.  Breaking up with a bad realtor does not need to be difficult.
  • In order to terminate your contract with you agent, you need to make sure you document everything and end amicably. 
  • There are many buyers and sellers who break up with the realtor but still need real estate services.  There are alternative options for selling your house without a realtor.

When Is It Time To Break Up With Your Realtor?

Some relationships, personal or professional, just don’t last. 

how to break up with your realtor

People change their mind, shift their priorities and move on altogether.  Some break ups happen quick while others linger on for months.

In fact, in the United States, 50% of marriages end in a divorce. 

how to break up with your real estate agent

So, if that’s true, then how can we expect a relationship with a real estate agent to be any better?

At least with an ex-wife or ex-husband you loved them, lived with them and cared for them. 

None of those even apply to a realtor!  Well, unless your realtor is your significant other. 🙃

It’s no surprise then, that many buyers and sellers cancel their contracts with their agents each and every year.

Signs That I Should Break Up With My Realtor

If you’re thinking about ending it with your real estate agent, it’s probably for a good reason.

It would be unlikely that your realtor is doing a great job, getting you results and out of no where you decided to just terminate the agreement. 

But in the same regard, you did like them enough at one point to hire them.

breaking up with your realtor

So, what happened?

In most cases, realtors just might not be getting their client the expected results or possibly any results if they are doing a poor job.

In certain cases, it could be the realtor’s fault.  In other cases, it could be your fault!

Let’s talk about some of the most common reasons that buyers and sellers drop their agent and move on.

Poor Communication

Poor communication is at the top of the list because it covers almost everything that a real estate agent could get wrong.

Picture this:

You decided to finally sell your house.  It’s the biggest financial decision of your life.  You hire a realtor.  And for weeks, you hear nothing.

You call them.  No answer.

You leave a voicemail.  No response.

You text them.  Silence.

At this point, you are infuriated.

breaking up with your real estate agent

For all we know, the agent could be literally busy selling your house.  Or, they might just be lazy and disinterested in pushing your listing. 

Poor communication from realtors typically shows up in the following ways:

  1. Agents that do not provide periodic updates on showings, offers and negotiations.
  2. Realtors who turn down offers on your behalf without giving you a final review.
  3. Brokers who neglect to align on expectations with sellers or buyers (price setting, timing, etc.).
  4. Agents who literally just post listings on the MLS but do not otherwise actively market the property.
  5. Realtors who are super communicative up until you sign an agreement with them and then they seemingly disappear.

These are just some examples, but happen to be very common ones too.

Poor communication creates tension and drives a divide between buyers, sellers and realtors.

Lying

On the other end of the spectrum, you might have a real estate agent who communicates but not truthfully.

This is a massive problem.

Again, it’s the biggest financial decision of your life and you have your agent – the person representing your best interests – lying to you.

ending your contract with a realtor

Why would they lie?

Well, it’s possible that lying will get a deal across the finish line. 

Heck, it might even get them more commission in their pockets.

Here are some of the lies I’ve seen agents tell buyers and sellers:

Lies Agents TellExample
Overpromise the listing price“You can sell your house for more with me listing it.”
Fabricating buyers“I know a guy who would be interested in buying your house.”
Agents trying to get double commission“I have an offer from a buyer I am also representing.  I can reduce my commission.”
Withholding offers“There are no other “solid” offers coming in.”
Defending a higher commission“My commission is the highest around because I offer a white glove service and experience.”
Promising a timeframe“We can sell your house 60 days, no problem.”
Assuaging property condition concerns“It’s a hot market, you don’t need to make any repairs.”

Lying is a deal breaker for anyone.

Agents who lie or misconstrue information to their clients should be penalized or put on probation.

So many times, my team and I pick up the pieces of agents who set their clients up with lies about selling their home.

Withholding Information

If you’ve ever sold a home before, you might know just how nerve wracking it can be.

You get it listed.  And then wait.

And wait and wait…

Most of the time, offers may be coming in.  But if you have an agent who believes that they can negotiate on your behalf then you may not be seeing all or any of these offers.

Real estate agents tend to only share super pertinent information with their buyers or sellers because they believe they are doing them a service by simplifying the process and absorbing the back and forth of negotiations.

The reality is that it makes the buyer or seller believe that either:

  • You are not doing your job as an agent.
  • The house is not priced correctly.
  • You are not communicating all the information.

A good agent will tell the seller everything.

Everything means:

  1. Number of offers coming in each week
  2. Number of showings coming in each week
  3. Number of phone calls from other agents
  4. Feedback on the property after showings
  5. Updating and revising comparable sales analysis
  6. Results from other marketing methods (number of outbound calls, number of ad campaigns, etc.)

Withholding information about the buying and selling of real estate just frustrates buyers and sellers. 

Agents should be relaying information, not withholding it.

Unavailable To Support You

This one is painful to watch, but quite common as well.

It’s the 5-star review dilemma.  Everyone wants to eat at 5-star restaurants, buy products from Amazon with 5-star reviews and only hire agents with 5-star service and accolades.

Hey, I know this because my first business in Philadelphia has a 5-star review profile. 

People work with us because we have social proof from others that our service is top-notch:

reputable cash house buyer

The problem is:

Everyone wants to work with these agents. 

And as realtors, sometimes they just don’t know how to say “no”.

The data doesn’t lie here:

ending your contract with a real estate agent

There is a very high correlation between number of 5-star positive reviews on an agent’s realtor profile and total number of transactions they closed.

People work with people they trust.

But therein lies the problem.

Reputable and trustworthy agents are just too busy to take on additional clients.

So, what do they do?

It’s usually one of two things:

  1. They get you signed up for their service and assign someone from their team to work with you.  Yikes, what if they don’t have a five-star reputation like their boss?
  2. They get you signed up for their service and “ghost” you.  You don’t hear from them, they don’t call and you’re left wondering what’s going on.  But hey, you are now contractually obligated to work with them – I guess just on their schedule.

Don’t fall for this trap.

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I like to look for agents who have four- or five-star review profiles from Zillow, Realtor.com and Google.  However, I would only suggest working with one who has less overall reviews.  This demonstrates to me someone who is good, but the word has not gotten out yet.  These are hungry realtors who will treat your situation as their top priority!

Deciding To Fire Your Real Estate Agent

By now, you know what a poor real estate agent experience looks like.

And if it’s bad enough, you’ve already made up your mind to fire your realtor.

But before you pull the trigger, you want to consider a few different things. 

Let’s cover those.

Firing A Buyer’s Agent

Terminating your relationship with your buyer’s agent can be done on peaceful terms.

Before you do this though, plan it out.

You should know why you are ending the contract with your realtor. 

Additionally, you should have a good idea whether they will expect this or be surprised by it.

And lastly, you should always aim for a peaceful termination – even if you are angry or frustrated with them over their performance. 

Cancelling A Contract With My Buyer’s Agent – Considerations

Here are my top tips and considerations for parting ways with your buyer’s agent:

  1. Be sure that you are not firing your agent and then making an offer with a different agent on a property that they originally showed to you.
  2. Be honest with him/her about why you are leaving them.  Extra points for sharing specific feedback with them: this includes details about your buying plans changing, their communication, what your plan is going forward, etc.
  3. Say thank you.  This agent may have shown you dozens of properties which is time and money to them.  A sincere thank you is a minimum requirement to end amicably.
  4. Take ownership if you are part of the problem.  If you are no longer relocating or maybe you lost your job, let the agent know that you are the reason you need to cancel.
  5. Get it in writing.  Signing a termination clause to your agency agreement is going to protect you from future liability and any other miscellaneous claims.  This is important if you and your agent are ending on bad terms.

Firing A Seller’s Agent

Ending an agreement with your listing agent could be an entirely different exercise.

After all, this person has your house listed.  They probably have a key to it.  And above all else, they have invested more of their money into listing your property than a buyer’s agent might have invested with one of their clients.

For the majority of people looking to break up with their realtor, this will be the situation that you are facing.

Cancelling A Contract With My Listing Agent – Considerations

Here are my top tips and considerations for parting ways with a seller’s agent:

  1. Be sure that you are trying to just cut your agent out of an offer you have from their MLS listing.  This never works out well for sellers.
  2. Have a logistical plan to fire your agent and move on.  You can use my 4-step plan below.
  3. Show your appreciation.  It’s likely that your listing agent did invest some of their resources into marketing and showing your home.  You may not be liable to reimburse them (check your listing agreement!) but even small gestures like leaving a positive review or being a reference could go a long way in minimizing any backlash.
  4. Your listing agent will want to know what the new plan is.  Did you find another agent?  Are you no longer selling? 
  5. Get it all in writing.  The only correct way to terminate a listing agreement is to get it done in writing.  Depending on the type of your agreement (open listing, exclusive, etc.) it is critical to get a termination clause attached to it.

How To Break Up With My Realtor – 4 Step Approach

This 4-step approach is universal.

Anyone can safely and successfully break up with their real estate agent using this approach.

However, skipping one or more of the steps below could be a fast-track to failure.

And in the world today, with everyone being litigious, you won’t want to leave any room for recourse from an angry real estate agent.

how to break up with my realtor

Step 1 – Tell Them

Set a date and time that you will call your agent or meet them in person to share the news.

I suggest calling first before you set up an in-person meeting.

These are the things you want to convey in the call:

  1. You are cancelling your contract with the agent.
  2. The reasons why you are doing this.
  3. The next steps (exchanging of keys, termination clauses, timing, etc.)

Step 2 – Adhere To Timing & Logistics

From Step 1, execute.

You may have agreed to meet your agent in person at the house or their brokerage office. 

Be on time.  And do not reschedule.

Or, in some cases, you might have agreed to having them mail you the keys or leaving them in a mailbox.

Either way, you need to follow through on what you communicated.

Which leads me to Step 3. 

Step 3 – Terminate Agreements

Request a termination clause that ends your agency agreement.

This step is the most important of the four steps.

Having a signed termination clause officially releases you from working with that agent on real estate transactions.

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Ask for this clause in step 1.  The earlier you ask for the clause, the faster this goes and the better off for both parties.

Step 4 – Move On

Have a plan to move on.  Ending your relationship with a bad broker is one thing, but you should have a plan lined up. 

For one, your realtor will ask you. 

And if you don’t have an answer, they might continue to pursue your business. 

And secondly, having a new plan will help you move on from the poor experience. 

Nobody wants to sulk on a bad past anyways.

How To Move On From A Bad or Lazy Realtor

The options are endless now that you have broken up with your realtor.

You can keep your house.  Lease it.  Sell it.  And so on…

If you are still interested in selling or buying property, then it’s simply just back to the drawing board.

You could either:

  1. Do-it-yourself – Either directly call listing agents and put offers in or sell your own house FSBO.
  2. Hire a new agent – Find a new agent that can deliver results for you.  Use this article to qualify that person.
  3. Sell your house fast – Go directly to a local cash buyer who can give you an offer to purchase your home.

If you aren’t up for a lot of work and effort, then you can easily cross off the first DIY option.

breaking up with a bad realtor

And honestly, many people pass that option up.  It’s just not in their wheelhouse to be the person doing all the work.  It’s also not their specialty.

So, then it really boils down to finding another agent or just going with a speedy and convenient option.

Here’s one way to figure out what’s right for you:

Think about the bad or lazy realtor you just broke up with.  What did you not like about them?

Was it that they overpromised on some sort of result for your house?  Higher price for poorer condition property?

A cash offer on your home might be a more suitable option at this point – especially since the property has already been listed.

Or, do you believe the agent just did a poor job and stalled the entire process?

Ask yourself, are you confident that you can find a better and smarter agent to get you the outcome you want?

It’s easier said than done.

Common Questions – Breaking Up With A Realtor

Q: Can I switch real estate agents if I’m unhappy with the current one?

A:  Yes, of course you can!  Before you do, take a look at the contract you signed with that agent as it should outline the process to terminate or cancel.  You’ll want to be sure you understand the terms of that agreement before communicating with them.

Q: Will I owe my realtor any fees if I decide to break up with them?

A:  It depends.  Looking at the terms of your contract will explain what, if any, fees you might owe regardless of what happens with your agreement.  Some examples are cancellations fees or required minimum payments (whether a sale occurs or not).  If you aren’t sure or need help reviewing the contract, it’s best to consult with a legal professional.

Q: How should I communicate my decision to end the relationship with my realtor?

A: Do it promptly and directly.  Going in person or giving a phone call is typically the best course of action to start the break up process.  I suggest keeping it honest and professional – even if the mood is soured or parties are frustrated.  Say thank you and move on.



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Author: Doug Greene

Doug brings over a decade of real estate and business experience to his content. Educating homeowners and helping sellers with their properties is his passion.

His contributions have been featured on Realtor.com, Washington Post, Apartment Therapy, HomeLight, Better Homes & Gardens and many more.